{ Tuesday, June 21, 2005 }

Odds and Ends

Apologies for the lack of entry yesterday... last night I consumed three pint glasses of gin and tonic. Then I stopped at the ladies room on the way out and got locked in the bar. Because it was that closed. Then for some oddball reason, Steady and I stayed up and watched four episodes of Jeopardy!

I felt lovely this morning, thanks.

Today I went to the dentist. Because that is what I do. I'm beginning to develop a complex about it. I don't think you can blame me. At this point, I actually started sweating and shaking and feeling like I might cry shortly after the novacaine went in.

I don't have a problem with needles. I'm perfectly capable of closing my eyes and not worrying about the needle. I understand that the needle is going to give me the drugs and the drugs are my best friend.

No, this was about all the negative reinforcement from my recent dental fiascos. To review: one cavity, three chips, repaired. Pain. Root tip, removed. Pain. Bite adjusted. Pain. Pain pills. Psychotic episode. Pain. Tooth seriously cleaned due to infection. Pain. Antibiotics. Projectile Vomit. Pain. Root canal. Pain and swelling. Bruise on my face.

And let's not forget that each time I went back, I had to pay for this ongoing nightmare. And I had to miss work almost every time, and during the peak of the pain, I missed two whole days.

And lately my mouth has been so much better, and the bruise was starting to go away and I did not want to go to the dentist today. I wanted this all to be over. I don't hurt so much anymore and that's really enough.

But I had to go and have the root canal finished. And now it's finished. It was horrible and the corner of my lips is raw and at one point this afternoon was bloody from where the instruments went in. And I'm pretty sure the bruise on my face will be back with a vengence.

The kicker? I still have to go back one more time before this can be finished. I have chipped teeth on the other side that need to be addressed now too. The one opposite the root canal tooth (that's the last one back on top) has sharp spots and really does need some repair.

July 11. Seven am.

We have a problem in the new apartment. It's a gated community. The pizza delivery man will not come through the gate. Seriously. I ordered a pizza and told them to buzz me when they got here.

There are actually two gates between the outside world and my apartment. Gate one is to get in the complex. Gate two is to get into the building. Both have call boxes.

So, the first time we had pizza delivered, the deliveryman called as he was approaching and asked me to meet him outside the main gate. I basically said no. He basically said I would have to meet him outside the second call box. This seemed like a reasonable enough comprimise to me. And I also thought that give the size of this place, all the delivery people would get in the habit of going through the gates pretty soon.

This time, when I ordered they told me I would have to meet the deliveryman outside of the main gate. No negotiating. And so I did. I walked down from the fourth floor and across the complex and met him outside the gate.

I can't help but feel this is a bit ridiculous.

The [return of the] Fine Print:

2004: "Shelly: It's the kind on the Bay Bridge. Someone had an accident and now all the other cars in the entire state are all sitting here having a little party. Just me and five hundred thousand of my neighbors."

2003: "Isis! Who said you could have friends over? Because you can't. The lease specifically states that you can't have friends over. It says clearly that we may have one cat, a neutered male Domestic American Shorthair of the orange tabby variety who responds to Isis. No friends."

2002: "Worst case scenario? I make an ass of myself. He knew me in high school. I somehow doubt he'd recognise me if I didn't make an ass of myself."

posted by mary ann 10:50 PM