Random and Spotty.
I totally relate to this. The other night I somehow made a phone call to Writer Guy when I was so drunk... I don't recall this, but he says it happened. All I remember was all the puking. At the bar. On the way to the car. Out the door of the stopped car on the way home. In the yard. In the bathroom. On the floor next to my bed. I don't see how that left time to make the call. He claims that I was not throwing up while I was leaving the message. But I also somehow manage to hit almost every criteria for membership in the OLP. I totally understand.
mary: Wow, that's a lot of toilet paper.
Emma: We go through a lot. It's cheaper in bulk. It's not like we're not going to use it.
DJ: I bet you girls really go through a lot of toilet paper.
Ellie: You have no idea.
DJ: Since I've been living alone and not entertaining so much, it's amazing how much less toilet paper I go through.
mary: I'm really confused. I never really guaged the amount of toilet paper used in various situations.
Emma: That's because we buy it in bulk.
DJ: Well, girls use a lot more toilet paper than boys do. I imagine four girls use a lot. You're smart to buy twenty-four rolls at a time.
Ellie: We really go through an astounding amount of toilet paper.
DJ: I bet. Probably like a roll everyday.
mary: I guess I just don't pay enough attention.
Emma: How long are we going to talk about this?
mary: My thighs hurt.
Ellie: What have you been doing?
mary: Riding my bike in the rain.
Ellie: Is that what you crazy single kids are calling it?
mary: Yes, I have managed to find a way to have sex that leaves the tops of my thighs suddenly sore days later.
Ellie: Sure, sure.
mary: My point was, can I borrow your car to get some cigarettes? I'll put a couple dollars worth of gas in it.
Ellie: Yeah. No problem. Can you pick me up a two liter? Something without caffeine?
mary: Of course. Anything else?
Ellie: I would offer to drive you, but I'm not prepared to leave this couch.
mary: Okay, I'm leaving. Gas, cigarettes, two liter. That's all right?
mary: Do I need to put my hair up first?
Ellie: Actually, your hair looks like that girl with the brillo-pad hair who got that make-over on television today. You know, before. You might want to do something about that before you leave.
mary: I almost walked out the door. You weren't really about to let me leave like that were you?
Ellie: I was gonna laugh at you when you got back.
mary: After putting gas in your car and buying you soda?
Ellie: Are you going to leave?
Go read we thought we were deep. I actually kinda like that poem. I totally remember the night I think inspired that poem. And again, I feel compelled to let everyone know that Chet is alive and well today and we totally do have permission to be publishing the poetry he wrote for me seven years ago.
Best closing for an e mail ever... "i hate who you hate," -- the green woman. That is the prime example of why I love my friends so much. That unconditional support.
Okay, I think those are all my assorted random bits for right now...
posted by mary ann 5:43 PM